education, Thought Provoking, Uncategorized

Journal Entry at 3:00am – THIS TIME I HIT SEND

To give you no context to the letter below would be a mistake.

It was only days after I freshly got fired from the school I was working at as a teacher assistant (for “undisclosed reasons” – [Arizona is a “Right to Work” state so they don’t have to tell you why they fired you] *smh*).

I was kinda pissed but mostly shocked.

So there I am, woken up by my daughter having a scary dream in her sleep (poor thing! – she is only three). My mind is fully awake. I toss and turn thinking, “WHAT IN THE HELL COULD THEY HAVE FIRED ME FOR?”. After about 30-40 minutes of this nonsensical loop, I did what I usually do when my mind runs, I get up and write.

I wrote about only one thing: my feelings of being cheated! (basically I felt cheated because I wasn’t able to continue this rich and valuable professional relationship I was building with the “Dean of Students”, “Ms. Shelly”). It was unfair! Our conversations always had substance to it and every time I talked to her I gained new insights into the politics of education. It was great.

So I communicated these emotions… because anyways, when you have just the right blend of emotions (at 3:00am) and a wild heart, something spectacularly odd can glean the pages. And this was the letter that I wrote:

“Ms. “Not Mary” Shelly,

Thank you again, so much, for noticing my unanswered question at that meeting we had the other day. It’s those simple acts that so powerfully describe your character. I deeply respect who you choose to be.

I will do my best at offering this terribly weak apology: an apology, in advance, for any awkwardness this letter may cause (given the situation of course).
……………………………………..
*taking in a breath* *then authentically smiling*

Not that this next detail matters too much, sometimes it’s nice to just laugh about things: I actually spent an hour the other day – before any of this happened – typing out a wonderfully crafted email inside of Outlook, however, as you probably have had experience with, it timed out on me and I lost all of it. *Wha -Wha- Whoaaaaaw*

I just want to be absolutely clear: I am like puppy-dog excited to talk with you about non-work related material! (which is why my ears fold about all of this because I feel like we had left so much on the table ):

But honestly, I am an impatient man, a lifelong learner as well, so I just say screw it – time heals everything anyway. (unfortunately for us we don’t have that magic ingredient in this brief letter – and it’s never fun touching a raw, fleshy wound)

So this is my best shot at being as tender as I can (even though my timing isn’t) *sorry man* 😛

As you might have already gathered (?), my brain is literally exploding at all times. It’s on a non-stop firing mode for innovation and new ideas are hitting me at maybe a dozen a day in real time. I can’t turn it off. for example: I know I disclosed to you this “mega-project” I had going on about synthesizing the national curriculum and making it free for parents and educators to have an open dialogue about…. and just how scandalous this might actually be… well that project is only one out of many that I have. (and of two other mini-mega side projects not related to education). Each of my ideas are – most likely – equally ambitious. (For the longest time I thought this is how all humans were too, and I just happened to pay more attention to this constant stream of ideas. But as it turns out – my suspicion was otherwise solidified only after recently listening to Elon Musk/Joe Rogan podcast, of which I highly recommend!). This is exactly why I am a terrible employee. *kind of laughing* I feel far too alive inside to abide by societal or local norms – which are honestly plainly bizarre constructs! (probably founded from  plain insecurity, I might add).

anyways.
I’m angry. I am angry MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE with our (you and I, I mean) “apparent” communication block. I honestly am not that mad that I got fired compared to the possible INVALUABLE relationship that could have flowered over our dialogues. You see, I know basically, actually, literally, not a soul on this planet other than you that actually cares about the same thing that I do in a thoughtful manner. SO you can see why this email feels “desperate” (?). I have been on an island my whole life – in dreamland it appears from the outside – on how to maximize the potential for education in serious manner. It appears very few have glimpsed the true magnitude of the grandest potential for the field of education; if they did, honestly, they could only feel like shit about themselves pursuing anything else. It blows my mind even reflecting on it now.
…………………………………

okay. there is A LOT more but

let’s cut this short.

What’s the point of this letter? I don’t expect a reply from you because I understand what could be at stake. So what could I possibly expect? You to just smile or sneer at all of this from the other side of the paper?

Maybe.

More than anything this is a cry for resources. I need help. Honestly, I need a community. I don’t fit in here (or anywhere mostly)! I especially don’t fit in at the school, Lion Purr’s (lol). The fact of the matter is, I need to move mountains but I can’t do it by myself, not in 4 or even 5 life-times.

So what am I asking?

I am asking, kindly, when you have time and feel a reply is appropriate, (probably to iidentifywithignorance@gmail) to give some direction, ANY direction. I need honest advice – I try to explain but genuinely no one listens or cares about my ideas. (I know because I share them with everyone) I just need direction from someone that at least cares! *sort of holding back inarticulable words and emotions* Athena, do you know of communities or people that would like to get involved in doing HEAVY reconstruction in education (specifically starting a school that offers alternative degrees that hold no inherent value but will eventually prove viable in the free-market and out-compete the high school diploma)? And I am not talking about democratic schools like Sudbury, or even the unschooling communities, I am talking about real, serious entrepreneurs and educators that want to tap into the field of education to transform the way we do education for generations and generations to come. (I literally already have models ready to present, even potential drafts for business plans!)

C’mon now!

*God this letter l feels heavy, doesn’t it?* 😉

At the end of the day, if you don’t help me, and you don’t reply, and it turns out that you actually just sneered this off, don’t worry about it. I already know that (if it is the case that I don’t die in the next 50 or so years from some freak accident) that all of the things I want to manifest into the world will become manifest. I will accomplish all of the things I seek to accomplish with or without your help.

It is just a matter of whether or not you want to be a part of this story.

Thanks for your precious time,

– Chase S. Gielda.”

~ In case you were wondering, to protect all persons involved I have used “alter-ego” names. “Lion Purr” is the authoritarian place I was fired from and “Athena Shelly”… heh! *huffing air out of my nose with silent laughter because it’s not that funny* is the “Dean of Students” at Lion Purr’s. ~

Yeahup. Only there is one catch to this letter, I couldn’t send it electronically. The day I was fired, I was locked out of all of their systems, even my payroll portal. Even if I knew Ms. Shelly’s email by heart, it would get filtered out through their servers. But I was determined to deliver this letter to her as soon as humanly possible. That morning, at like 5:00 am, I texted one of my co-workers asking if she could deliver this letter to Ms. Shelly. I didn’t want my co-worker to email it because then it could get her in trouble for “conspiring” or something (idk). So she printed off the letter and delivered it to Ms. Shelly anonymously. Which means, I don’t know FOR SURE if Ms. Athena Shelly actually read the letter.

At the time of publishing this online, more than a week has passed and I still have not received a reply. *still crossing my fingers* I’ll keep y’all posted if she does.

Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

 

– All the best,

Chase Gielda

 

p.s. Thanks so much for reading! I hope you got as much a kick out of reading it as I did writing it. To me, this is the perfect place to re-stake/re-establish myself as a writer. I had so much fun writing it that it re-ignited my love for writing. I hope to write more like this and share it with you. Until next time!

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Thought Provoking

The Implications of Infinity

My astronomy professor got to the “expansion of the universe” unit and went over how we figured out the age of the Universe using Hobble’s Constant, which is a measurement of the expansion of the space-time fabric that the universe is made up of. Hubble’s Constant came about from the observation that the more distant the galaxy is away from Earth, the faster it travels away from us. Then our professor told us something that is contradictory to the idea that space and time are connected. He told us that the universe is likely infinite in size. Infinity is defined as endless, without boundaries. Keeping this in mind, how far does space go? When we look out at the distant stars and galaxies, could that space be infinite?

                                         aHubbleLaw2

Before I go into why the universe must have a boundary, lets talk about the super cool parts of what it would mean for the universe to be without a boundary. If the universe really were infinite in size, then whatever fictional world of characters you could imagine, as long as it abided by the laws of the universe (laws of physics), it would be in existence as we speak. True infinity is to say there is someone out there exactly like you doing exactly as you are doing right at this very moment. So continue reading this along with your new clone. Too bad your clone doesn’t actually exist. The universe is not infinite and this is because the universe had a beginning.

Now let’s slow down and let it all sink in.

  1. If the universe were infinite in size, it’s “beginning” would have happened at an infinite time in the past.
  2. An infinite amount of time has not passed.
  • The universe began roughly 13.7 billion years ago as predicted by Hubble’s Constant. That means space has only had 13.7 billions years to expand to the size it is today. If the universe had infinite time to expand, the universe would have died a heat death. For those that don’t know what heat death is, essentially it is the certain fate that all of the stars and sources of light in the universe will burn out and the space between the stars will expand so far from each other, the universe will reach a temperature of 0 kelvin – absolute zero, the temperature at which atoms stop motion [zero energy]. However it is not the case that the universe has died a heat death because we are still here.
  • Since space and time are connected as one, there cannot be infinite space and finite time, because there is finite time, there is finite space.

Age

Here is the trip, and why my astronomy professor holds strong to the idea that space is infinite, despite how contradictory it is – when we look out into space and examine the distant galaxies all around us, we observe that there is an equal amount of matter in all directions. That is to say that we see no evidence of an edge to the universe. That leads to a couple possible conclusions: One, the universe is much, much bigger than we imagined, making our local ecosystem appear as a smooth drop in an even bigger sea. Or two, the universe began everywhere. When you ask astronomers where the universe began to expand, they are going to tell you that it began everywhere because at the very beginning, all points in space were at a single point, the same point. So what happens when I present my professor with this idea that space has a limit? He tells me that I misunderstand because there is an infinite quantity of points in space.

Well I am stuck. Are there infinite points even though not infinite time has passed on our clock? Maybe my understanding of space-time is wrong, or maybe our understanding as a scientific community is wrong. Logically it seems space can only be finite in size. There must be something missing: Relativity.

What philosophers and astronomers can both agree on is that space, at the very least, has a relative boundary. Any light beyond 13.7 billion light years away would have to be traveling faster than light to reach us – which also implies we would have to be traveling faster than light to escape the ‘edge of the universe’. I like to compare the relative edge to our universe as an ‘event horizon’ in a black hole. For those of you that do not know, a black hole is called a black hole, not because it is black, but because it does not emit light (meaning it is transparent and invisible). This is due to the fact that its gravity is stronger than the required velocity for light to escape it. The point at which the escape velocity exceeds the speed of light is called the ‘event horizon’. Am I sneakily pointing out that our universe exists within a black hole? Maybe.

What are we to make of all this? Are space and time really connected as one or are they separate and the universe is infinite in size but not infinite in time? Let those with integrity examine what is being said and decide for themselves the implications of infinity.

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Nature of Existence, Thought Provoking

Psychohydraulics (A Meditation on Language)

Where does language’s authority come from?

Language is a deeply integral part of our life; it’s difficult to grasp its value and purpose. Literally, I can express a thought, just as these words are doing now, and through writing, bring something within myself into concrete existence. I can describe a place in my imagination to another conscious being and they can imagine roughly the same as I do! Through the facial expressions of a child, we can interpret anger, or joy. Through vocal tone or percussion, we can separate serious from sarcastic. By the paints on a canvas, we can feel beauty and connection or desolation and pain. There is a shared, unspoken language that each of us understand. What is that? Not only should we be asking what particular language that it is, but, what is language and where does it come from?

Language will be defined as a medium for communication and expression understood through meaningful, coherent patterns. It is a catalyst for expression – something that we are so totally absorbed in that we forget it’s place in creation. Referring back to the question introducing this piece, what gives language it’s power? Think, tens of trillions of prayers request for a reality that is different from a current one, why would any of them come true? Are we the ones giving meaning to the pattern of sounds, or have coherent patterns always existed and we are drawing from something fundamental, upon which existence has built its foundation (language being a quality of existence). My suggestion is that language is divine – meaning that language is not strictly an invention of man, it is eternal in nature. Divine Language (communication) transcends all intentions in all forms; it is a real connection lying within each one of us.

Language looks to be the only real link to a greater depth of understanding – we think in it, we speak in it; it is all encompassing and therefore illusive when we reach to it. How can we understand language when we are confined to think only about it within it’s own boundaries? Can we transcend language?

The take away: the language in which we speak cannot be fully understood in the same means by which we speak it; it must be transcended by the highest language (in this case, meaning understood without our spoken word).

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Thought Provoking

Let’s Talk About Reality

Ok guys, I want to point out something that is rarely talked about, thought about, or investigated – that is the imagination (We will define the imagination as the mental images, and sensory details that you can experience with your minds eye). The imagination has fascinated me only recently over the past few months. I was inspired after watching Esther Perel’s TED Talk on, ”The secret to desire in a long-term relationship”. The idea was introduced to me that our imaginations are a much more active force in creating experiences  we desire than given credit for. It lead me to question, “how powerful is the imagination?”. We know that it is powerful enough to invent an understanding of our origin: creation – because we have used creation stories to make sense of where we come from.

So think about this: when we read creation stories, whether it be scientific ones like the big bang, or religious ones as in Genesis, we had to envision, in our minds, all the parts and possibilities that allow that creation story make sense to our brains.

Why did I bring up creation stories? Well I want to point out to question: what is the key difference between the created and the creator, what is already here, and what is perceived as being there? Can we say that the actual events that are recorded in a car accident (created) and the perceived events (creator) have no relation to one another? The intuitive belief is that we have no real effect on our day-to-day experience. But let’s try being insane.

So what is to say that really the, “big bang”, the event from which the universe has theoretically sprang, is actually derived from our imagination – but not just derived from it, sure we could not picture the universe and all of it’s workings without the imagination, but what if the imagination is the genesis of creation? Whose to say that the origin of understanding and even present experience is ultimately from our perception interpreted via imagination?

The take away: Is the spout (meaning, imagination) which we use to make sense of our reality, really the origin of our world?

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